Higher State

hey guys...
once again i've gone M.I.A. and i really need to stop and get it together... i guess sometimes i just have nothing very important to say or any fashion ideas to give..idk but none the less i'm here now with a mouthful to say and a lot to get off my chest...

So i finally figured out what i want in a relationship ( i told you sometimes this blog would sometimes just reek with my personal life) but yeah so i found out what i want... i wanna settle down..
idk i guess i'm over the meaningless relationships i've had and the wasted time i've spent on guys that in the end i either hurt or they hurt me.. so i want someone i can count on, makes me laugh, wants to just hang out, and loves God.. i don't think that list is to steep.. ohh yeah and of course he needs to be artistic in some sort of way...

to be honest so far i've kept my options very open... i just don't get caught up in any one guy ever anymore for the simple fact that i know there not getting caught up in me.. i think the wise thing to do is to remember that if your not boyfriend and girlfriend technically there isn't any rules on dating anyone else although when things do get serious it's pretty frowned upon..

anyways so there's someone from my past that has become something of my present..
i don't wanna speak to soon about it but let's just say i feel like the way i felt in highschool.. but it's a good feeling... not like that.. "he doesn't know what he wants feeling" but the "dang i could see this working out if we just take it slow" and i mean REAL slow.. i don't wanna rush with that because he and i both have been hurt before and dealt with love and its rollercoaster of emotions.. i just feel like it's been right... i've known that since i was 16...

yeah i know i'm 19 now but even then something felt right about dude..of course things happend and i was young and so was he so there's no reason in wishing the past didn't happen but i think it happen so that whatever happens in the future could happen ya know?

idunno maybe i'm getting ahead of myself but i feel like it's right...heck i barely got an ounce of sleep by being on the phone until 5:30am but i was wide awake for class and i couldn't get him off my mind... -blushes- but like i said i can't get overly excited..who knows what can happen.. like something really bad can happen.. i hope it doesn't.. but i don't wanna get my hopes up.. one thing i def learned from my ex..is not to get my hopes up for ANYTHING! so we'll see how that goes...

but yeah other then that life is good school is getting better i'm finally finding people that i feel like i can be my total self around ya know? that's a good thing since i've had such a challenging year but whatever it's almost over and in 2 short weeks i'll be back in atlanta with all the people that i love (= eek i'm so happy to go home!

haha but anyways i'm going to go get some sleep before i tackle this studying i have to do...lol..
talk to you guys soon.
(;
bri

ps.
upcoming blog post will do some research on some underground hiphop/r&b/soul artist and maybe some people that don't get the credit they deserve..cough cough corinne bailey rae.. well in the states at least...